Reznor says he hit one of his lowest points while touring to promote The Downward Spiral.
Original Source: thefix.com
Nine Inch Nails frontman Trent Reznor says that he thought alcohol would provide him relief, but it ended up causing more problems than it solved. Despite that he still had an “awkward adjustment” to sober life, he said in the latest issue of Kerrang magazine.
“I had romanticized the idea of what drugs and alcohol’s role in my life was,” Reznor said, according to NME. “I’m not saying it didn’t provide great moments of great escape and relief, and easing of pain, but it wound up creating chaos and destroying things – destroying creativity in my case.”
“There was an awkward adjustment of learning how to live without that, without those things, those people, those crutches and habits,” Reznor said.
“Once I got on stable ground and started to understand how my brain worked without all that, musically at least, I can do more because I can remember what I did. I can think deeper about things.”
“Downward Spiral felt like I had an unending bottomless pit of rage and self-loathing inside me and I had to somehow challenge something or I’d explode,” he told The Guardian in 2013. “I thought I could get through by putting everything into my music, standing in front of an audience and screaming emotions at them from my guts … but after a while it didn’t sustain itself, and other things took over – drugs and alcohol.”
Even after he got sober those feelings didn’t entirely go away, and Reznor still allows himself to connect with his ugly side.
“I’m inspired by how I feel, and I attempt to be as honest as I can be about those feelings,” he said, noting that the album that he released last year was one of his darkest. “Not The Actual Events, for example, was I think one of the ugliest records I’ve written in a long time, certainly sober. I’m allowed to go down some dark holes that I realized, in sobriety I hadn’t allowed myself to.”
“I don’t mean I’m using drugs, but I was allowing myself to think deeply about things I’ve felt, and things part of me still feel,” he said.